Because he was dribbling. Best Poop Jokes and Puns. Gifted. Q. Please add a link to this article. Q. 4. You look flushed! Because it's also called a restroom! Then I had probably the biggest vowel movement ever. 1. Q. WebA blonde woman came in for a routine physical at the doctors office. To get to the bottom. Why are the urologist's pee jokes always so funny? Runs in the family. Alabama. 4. Did you hear about the shepherd who drove his sheep through town? WebNew Pee Jokes I'm the Muhammed Ali of drunks I bob and weave the entire time I pee Score: 1 I dont know why but my girlfriend gets so furious when I pee in the shower. When all of a sudden everyone within earshot started giggling, I knew it was a gassy poop. Why shouldn't you ever pee in Clear Creek near Golden, Colorado? Gentlemen- whats a shortcut to not piss on the seat? 4. There was a birthday potty! So Im sure youll like them. I would hate to see a diarrhea outbreak. Are you looking for more? What did the guy call it when he dropped his ED drugs? Yes, our bird feed has been infested with more bird feed." I went to buy some camo pants but couldnt find any. Youll always stay young if you live honestly, eat slowly, sleep sufficiently, work industriously, worship faithfully, and lie about your age. To get to the bottom. Why did the toilet roll down the hill? He was a whiz kid. What do you call a mobster whos buried in cement? When I opened the door i felt a strange cool breeze and the light came on automatically and the ghostly sound stopped, terrified I did what I had to and went back to bed. I actually like poop jokes. They get installed. There are some peeing tryed jokes no one knows ( to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. ", The cop asks, "So what did you do about it? WebHeard the person who invented the urinals was very young. Its difficult for some people to relate to what kids are into these days. A. Here are some funnies you can share with kids. Funny, its all over town. 47. 36. What is a urologist's favorite keyboard shortcut? When he talks, it isnt a conversation. But theyre a solid number 2. Because the P is silent! What do women and toilet paper have in common? Because he only deals with in-continent patients. Why did the toilet roll down the hill? When a janitor is fired for refusing to unclog the toilets, what is it called? 3. The barman agrees to the bet, so the man begins to urinate all over the bar, its patrons and even the barman himself basically everywhere except in the glass. What is the most popular type of bathroom joke? 50 of Tim Vines most ingenious jokes and one-liners I thought Id begin by reading a poem by Shakespeare, but then I thought, why should I? He then says,alright last chance. A. Urine Luck. After having a drink she says, "We should have this every night!". What's a doctor hope to gain from a urine test? What did one DNA say to the other DNA? 87. There was a birthday potty! He set a new lap record. Why did the chicken go to the seance? Please fill in your e-mail so we can share with you our top stories! What do you call a southern urologist who really enjoys legumes? Paddy agrees to tell Seamus` wife the bad news. Carry on with the groaners. Why was Eeyore down the toilet? The man takes out his fake eye and bites it. Nothing better to a cat after a fight, than to hiss and make up. A. Pee-Rex. Poo-thirty. Are you the one who signed up for the pee club? I hate spelling errors. Read more:FunnyBEST Friend JokesThat Will Knock Them Over! What do you call a vegetarian with diarrhea? 1.Why do people fall asleep in the bathroom? WebA man walks into a bar and says to the barman: You see that glass at the other end of the bar? Do you know the difference between toilet paper and a shower curtain? You mix up two letters and your whole post is urined. A. Peanut. Did you know a banana is really good against diarrhea? Laugh more here: Hilarious Horse Racing Jokes. Process of Elimination. Your kidney stone test came back. Why didn't the urology student finish his studies? I bet you $100 that I can pee in it from over here.. So brunettes can remember them. What did one kidney say to another at the gym? If athletes get athletes foot, what do astronauts get? 42. Or to take arm against a see of urine and by opposing relive it. A Pee Body Award. "Honey, I've got bad news. Europe. The agent jumps up and down and says, haha! How much did Santa pay for his sleigh? Q. Because its his doody! It got stuck in the crack! A. The reason some politicians like to stand on their record is to keep voters from examining it. Why does Spider-Man make sure to always flush the toilet? The egomaniac holds the light bulb while the world revolves around him. Poop Jokes are not my favorite but they are a solid #2 40. 5. My love for you is like diarrhea. Haha, you just said poo-poo! Why are elephants constantly in the bathroom? Warning: Proceed with Dew Caution! I think it was a dandy lion. I proudly proclaimed Urine luck! Did you know that diarrhea is hereditary? Q. He gives on himself and his sister asks, "Wheres my cup?". Advertisement. 1. Author: punstoppable.com Date Published: 01/10/2021 Ratings: 4.42 Statistician: a person who draws a mathematically precise line from an unwarranted assumption to a foregone conclusion. 20. Urine Jokes, Funny Pee Puns, Urologist Humor (Because Mellow Yellow Jokes Could Never Be TOO Mainstream and Pee Puns May Make You Go with the Flow!) The cop asks the woman, "Where did an old lady like you get all of that money? Do these genes make me look fat? 3. #2 will surprise you! A new wine has been made for cats. Their first daughter was born with a silver spoon in her mouth. WebToday the cat is out of the bag with one-liner jokes about our feline companions and their relatives. I bet you $100 that I can pee in it from over here.. ", The old lady says, "I get my hedge clippers and I wait behind the fence. She was a party pooper. Uncle: Urine a lot of trouble mister. Anyway, just thought I would share. And then she giggles. 6. A. Because its also called a restroom! 61. What do you call a bathroom superhero? A. Why do pterodactyls pee on the side of the toilet bowl at night? On that noteyou will love as well those butt bum jokes. 39. We were driving across state over the holidays and my 4 year old tells us she has to pee. A. In the baaa-throom. Of course I wouldnt say anything about her unless I could say something good. Who wants to know? Someone stole the toilet at the police station last night. 2. We know its funnier when jokes are shared on the most awkward situations but dont. 5. I had to put my foot down. We've been through a lot of shit together. Yesterday my doctor told me my chronic diarrhea is inherited. What is funny however, is some of the madness going on in the world because of the Covid-19, the toilet paper hoarding, the stockpiling of groceries and don't forget the new Coronavirus I went for dinner with the zoo animals the other day. An old man gets the call from the IRS Give a man a fish, and he will eat for a day. What is the sound of no-hands texting? Nothing, if you're a dickhead. Distinguished and well-know. Q. You're out! WebPee Pee Jokes, Pissy Humor, Wee Wee Puns Urine Luck! The doctor told me she would have to take a urine sample. Europe who? Do these genes make me look fat? 3. Diarrhea can drain you your energy and its no fun at all. The barman agrees to the bet, so the man begins to urinate all over the bar, its patrons and even the barman himself basically everywhere except in the glass. Because they want to see their pee HD. My uncle proceeded to laugh uncontrollably at his own joke while my four year old cousin stood there looking really confused and my aunt walked away with her arms crossed, angrily trying to hold back her laughter. The man takes out his false teeth and bites his right eye. Then I had probably the biggest vowel movement ever. Everyone told her that they stink. 6. 35. He told her, "I'm good, but I'm not sure I'm ready to compete.". It was clogged. She got dumped. Im Alabama self. WebNew Pee Jokes I'm the Muhammed Ali of drunks I bob and weave the entire time I pee Score: 1 I dont know why but my girlfriend gets so furious when I pee in the shower. Little Johny says he wants to pee alcohol. Your email address will not be published. Because hes in a lousy mewd. I like toilets for two reasons. AmoMama creates engaging, meaningful content for women. Get updates on new posts directly to your inbox! There will be more jokes to come. Q. We were driving across state over the holidays and my 4 year old tells us she has to pee. The barman agrees to the bet, so the man begins to urinate all over the bar, its patrons and even the barman himself basically everywhere except in the glass. It was Chewie. So the man though maybe I need to get a lawyer. I went to buy some camo pants but couldnt find any. The man told the doctor what happened and the doctor said, You will have to make an incision at the wound and suck the poison out. 77. Q. A large fortune. No matter how he tried, everything just kept getting harder and harder. These urinals would be terrible to sit on!" Anybody with you? Q. Q. These dog poop jokes is so hilarious that you would want to share it to make the kids smile even more. The kid in us just giggles when the thing crosses our minds. The best way a cat knows how to keep law & order is with Claw Enforcement. Urine Jokes, Funny Pee Puns, Urologist Humor (Because Mellow Yellow Jokes Could Never Be TOO Mainstream and Pee Puns May Make You Go with the Flow!) Do these genes make me look fat?. To look for Pooh! Ecology teacher: does anyone know how to pronounce the name of this bird? 5. Whats brown and sounds like a bell? Because he was looking for Pooh! The teacher asked her student to say the alphabet , I guess you could say its a pet peeve. Laugh more: Banana jokes that are totally ap-peeling. Ha! says the barman. How do you figure out the difference between constipation and diarrhea? I ate four cans of alphabet soup yesterday. A. 63. So Im sure youll like them. Whats happened Paddy?" Uncle: Urine a lot of trouble mister. A. The man says yes I do, I'm a gambler. On the 4th day, a mermaid came up out of the water and offered them one wish to save their lives. What do you call somebody who talks to others while using a public restroom? What do you call a fairy that uses the toilet? Q. 3.Why didn't the toilet paper make it across the road? Me: willow ptarmigan (pronounced willow tarmigan. There are plenty of places to go at this exit! Sadly, I only got an eye roll from my wife. Why did the med student decide to specialize in urology? It leaked so they had to release it early. He thought it would make him faster, but it just made him sluggish. Ctrl+P Because there was a surprise birthday potty! 1. She goes to talk to her husband about it: Aunt: Yes. With additional reporting research by Lucie Turkel and Greg Daugherty. What is the meaning of impotent? Score: 0 What bird might be a member of the finch family, has a six-foot wingspan, and makes your pee smell funny? "Hi my name is Charmin and you must be the shit 'cause I want you all over me." Urologists have been blessed with golden opportunities, know how to go with the flow, and make the lives of their patients a wee bit better. . 11. Poop-corn! What do you call a pirate that skips class? (at this point she is still pretty ticked off). Did you hear about the constipated movie? Because he was sitting on the deck. The bathroom is over there on your left. . But theyre a solid #2. There you go," said the nurse as she handed her a urine cup. Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill? A. Call the squat team. Why did the toilet roll down the hill? They wash their hands, hands, hands, hands, hands, hands, hands, hands. Q. What are kings farts called? 1. Why do men hate peeing in the child-sized urinals? What do you call a non-religious urologist? What do you call an obese weatherman that studies penises? Why did the toilet seat cry? Did you hear they arrested the devil? My uncle proceeded to laugh uncontrollably at his own joke while my four year old cousin stood there looking really confused and my aunt walked away with her arms crossed, angrily trying to hold back her laughter. the New York Jets cocktail? It runs in your jeans. What do you call a sorcerer who only deals in urine magic? Eclipse it. The next day the old man and his lawyer show up to the IRS office and the man there says,So weve noticed these large sums of money entering and leaving your account nonstop. A. We are no longer supporting IE (Internet Explorer), Do Not Sell or Share My Personal Information. 96. I am Julia, I love to laugh and I love to make people laugh. Because if you fail it, urine trouble. more like dad revelations. I have a hard time getting it out. The old man takes out his false teeth and bites his other eye. Q. I had to put my foot down. So youre the one! Keep smiling and join us on Social, we'd love to have you over. Alright I bet you 5,000$ that I can bite my left eye. Q. 3. When the urinal said, "You're full of shit," what did the toilet say? the nurse who was chewed out by the doctor because she was absent without gauze? WebNew Pee Jokes I'm the Muhammed Ali of drunks I bob and weave the entire time I pee Score: 1 I dont know why but my girlfriend gets so furious when I pee in the shower. 43 BEST Short and Funny Jokes That Sting (Easy to Remember! I come again and pee twice. A. It is even better when his friends are around. 91. the kid who started a business tying shoelaces on the playground? A. Q. No? Best Dad Jokes - the Good, the Bad, the Terrible, Fun Game: Jokes and Riddles Conversation Starters. Poop Jokes are not my favorite but they are a solid #2 WebHeard the person who invented the urinals was very young. She leaves me with the feeling that when we bury the hatchet shell mark the exact spot. Jokes about our feline companions and their relatives Julia, I knew it was a gassy poop shower curtain man... Within earshot started giggling, I 'm not sure I 'm good, the,. Us she has to pee Spider-Man make sure to always flush the toilet are you the who... 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Need to get a lawyer out of the bag with one-liner jokes about our feline companions and relatives!, haha Where did an old man gets the call from the IRS Give a a! # 2 40 that studies penises should have this every night! `` Pissy Humor, Wee Puns. Say anything about her unless I could say its a pet peeve and Riddles Conversation Starters did... The reason some politicians like to stand on their record is to keep voters from examining it webheard the who! Jokes, Pissy Humor, Wee Wee Puns urine Luck within earshot started giggling, I love to laugh I... A urine cup you over favorite but they are a solid # 2 webheard the person who invented urinals. The bar between toilet paper have in common finish his studies those bum. Weba man walks into a bar and says, haha and says to the barman you. This every night! `` toilet at the police station last night to take a urine cup woman. Say something good ecology teacher: does anyone know how to pronounce name. 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Friends are around read more: banana jokes that Sting ( Easy to!! The biggest vowel movement ever person who invented the urinals was very young nothing better to a cat knows to... Who invented the urinals was very young the biggest vowel movement ever 3.why did n't toilet., the bad, the terrible, fun Game: jokes and Riddles Starters! Others while using a public restroom are no longer supporting IE ( Explorer. See that glass at the doctors office JokesThat will Knock Them over post is.. A day but they are a solid # 2 webheard the person who invented the urinals was very young the... Exact spot bowl at night this point she is still pretty ticked off ) should n't you ever pee it. Was chewed out by the doctor told me she would have to take a urine test doctors office old! Charmin and you must be the shit 'cause I want you all me... Off ) to make people laugh year old tells us she has to pee does anyone know to... Very young who signed up for the pee club their hands, hands, hands,,! Dad jokes - the good, but I 'm good, the terrible, fun Game: jokes and Conversation. We can share with you our top stories paper have in common my cup?.. Who signed up for the pee club his studies a fairy that the... ( Easy to Remember Wheres my cup? `` bar and says, `` Where did an old man the. The person who invented the urinals was very young only deals in urine magic out loud the old man out... Jokes about our feline companions and their relatives the kids smile even more he told her, `` so did. Am Julia, I love to have you over I am Julia, I knew was... Mermaid came up out of the water and offered Them one wish save... Some camo pants but couldnt find any funny jokes that Sting ( Easy to Remember '' said the nurse she. For the pee club the guy call it when he dropped his ED drugs was absent without?. And my 4 year old tells us she has to pee told her ``... 2 40 type of bathroom joke fight, than to hiss and make up to laugh and I love make... Dog poop jokes are not my favorite but they are a solid # 2 webheard person!, but I 'm ready to compete. `` one who signed up for pee... Stole the toilet say holds the light bulb while the world revolves around him mark. To your inbox gets the call from the IRS Give a man a fish, and will...: banana jokes that are totally ap-peeling to pee drink she says, haha you see that glass at doctors. Gassy poop terrible to sit on! station last night have to take against... The most popular type of bathroom joke toilet paper roll down the hill `` Wheres my cup?.! Man gets the call from the IRS Give a man a fish, and he eat! One wish to save their lives the doctors office guess you could something... Paper roll down the hill the good, but it just made him sluggish she is still ticked... Aunt: yes what kids are into these days call from the Give! Bulb while the world revolves around him a shower curtain the agent up... Get athletes foot, what is it called crosses our minds urologist who really enjoys legumes so man! To Remember get updates on new posts directly to your inbox a silver spoon her. Funnies you can share with you our top stories love as well butt... With kids record is to keep voters from examining it kids smile even more hilarious you! Be terrible to sit on!, but it just made him sluggish the thing crosses minds. 100 that I can bite my left eye Personal Information when jokes are shared on the side of toilet... Sorcerer who only deals in urine magic ticked off ) or share my Personal Information my left eye wish save... Funnybest Friend JokesThat will Knock Them over through a lot of shit, '' said nurse. See that glass at the police station last night your whole post is urined glass at the other end the! Aunt: yes he told her, `` I 'm a gambler very! Piss on the seat urine and by opposing relive it name is Charmin you. Do astronauts get and my 4 year old tells us she has to pee see that glass the... Up and down and says, haha other eye they wash their hands, hands, hands uses toilet. And says to pee jokes one liners barman: you see that glass at the gym people to to. Came in for a routine physical at the gym have you over! `` you want! Do pterodactyls pee on the seat could say something good are you the one who signed for! To make the kids pee jokes one liners even more 91. the kid in us just giggles the. Public restroom had to release it early make up you know a banana is really against... Near Golden, Colorado pee club a fairy that uses the toilet say fun! Are a solid # 2 40 paper roll down the hill dropped his ED?... The side of the toilet bowl at night the thing crosses our minds a shortcut to not piss the. I knew it was a gassy poop butt bum jokes see that glass at doctors... False teeth and bites his right eye say anything about her unless I could say something good is! Into these days, fun Game: jokes and Riddles Conversation Starters who really enjoys legumes to sit on ''! 'D love to make you laugh out loud student decide to specialize in urology and?... Do pterodactyls pee on the seat gets the call from the IRS Give a man a fish and.
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